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Upper Strasburg, PA

I’ve decided to run for Congress on a platform of replacing the current political system with a variety of carnival games and accepting only 50% of the Congressional salary and putting the other half into a philanthropic fund to be awarded to local charities through carnival games.

My pledge is to deliver the same standard of indifference and incompetence that our great people have come to expect of our elected officials; and to do it for half the price.

There will be traditional games like throwing darts at balloons (each balloon will contain a slip stating “Yea” or “Nay”. There will also be more entertaining events for higher profile pieces of legislation. One of those will be clown boxing. Here’s how it works:


Two clowns in a ring with gloves, trunks, and clown shoes.

We put “Yea” in one envelope and “Nay” in another envelope. Each envelope will be affixed to a clown’s trunks with duct tape.

The clowns will not know what they are fighting for.

Whichever clown hits the mat 3 times is the loser. The winner’s envelope will be opened, revealing either “Yea” or “Nay”

The result will be phoned into me - your Congressman- on the House floor, where I will simply relay the outcome as the vote on behalf of our district.

1/6/2021 10:40:21 PM

Central Illinois

Sound like you'll be doing more work than the current administration

1/7/2021 6:26:36 AM

Muddy Waters

I like it. The clowns had no police or military protecting the capital building? They are idiots

1/7/2021 7:37:36 AM